That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
