i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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