Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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