It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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