she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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