I wish I could teleport
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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