All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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