Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
one two three fourrrrnication!
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
