that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
only you would photoshop your dick
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Randomize
