If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
