I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
