Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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