I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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