On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
