yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize