I swear she didn't look like that last week.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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