DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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