Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
