idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
