She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
