Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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