But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
