It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
