Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
