i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she looked like the before picture.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
