I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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