THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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