Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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