a queef is a wish your heart makes.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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