Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
