I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
