i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
