dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize