a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize