So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
