My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
And then he peed in my hair
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
