Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
