Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Randomize
