Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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