okay pat passed out under dana's car
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize