yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize