But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
