take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Ketchup is God's man juice
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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