shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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