i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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