just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize