Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
