it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
