Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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