i think my tv is drunk
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize